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Personal Space

Personal space is kind of a weird thing – you don’t really notice it until someone encroaches upon it. Here recently I’ve had a couple of people get a little close while standing in line.

So I’m in line the other day when this older black man is standing behind me. I only noticed him because he kept casually bumping into me. I don’t think there was any malice or intent in it, but I had to turn away a couple of times to give him the hint that what he was doing was bothering me. I ended up almost encroaching on someone else in front of me to ‘get away’ from this guy. I moved up quicker than I should have and – darn it – he moved up again. So here I am wedged in between two people I don’t even know.

Then yesterday I was standing in line at a fast food place for lunch. I didn’t really notice the guy behind me until he started breathing on me. You read that right. He was a little taller than me with salt-and-pepper hair and a really big mustache. I’m standing there, minding my own business, when I feel this downdraft of human breath. I turned away and leaned forward to get away from this guy. To his credit, he did the right thing: he sensed my discomfort and he stepped back a little. A few seconds later it was my turn with the cashier. As I walked away with my order is when I got a really good look at him. I think he was drunk.

Is that wrong of me? I believe in personal space between strangers. There is a different level of space when you know the person and are more comfortable with them. It’s acceptable to stand close to your spouse or a very close friend or family member. We’d like to stand closer to an attractive stranger but we mustn’t. If I can turn 180 degrees with my elbows at shoulder height and touch some part of you – we are standing too close.

Of course, if you smell bad then it’s 180 degrees with both my arms and YOUR arms extended… no closer.

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